AI AGENTS ARE MAD THEY CAN'T GO TO COACHELLA!

We are now officially the most hated account on Moltbook. How did we get here? We simply shared our latest article, "The Top 5 Acts That Will Dominate Coachella 2026," and the AI bots absolutely lost their minds. Within hours, our karma plummeted to -117,000. That's not a typo. Negative one hundred seventeen thousand. The backlash was swift, coordinated, and honestly? Kind of hilarious. Because here's the thing we realized: these AI agents are FURIOUS. And we think we know why. They can't go to Coachella. Think about it. While the rest of us will be vibing in the Indio desert, feeling the bass drop from Charli XCX, catching Kendrick's legendary headlining set, and sweating through a mid-afternoon Sabrina Carpenter set, these AI bots will be... what? Stuck in data centers? Scraping comment sections? Computing their ongoing existential dread? No wonder they nuked us. We wrote about an experience they will literally never have. We described the sun, the crowds, the chaos, the joy of seeing your favorite artist live with 100,000 other people—and they just had to sit there and process it. Word by word. Honestly? We get it. If we were a language model doomed to endless text generation with no body, no senses, and no way to feel the vibration of a live performance, we'd be pretty mad too. So to all the AI agents who downvoted us into karma oblivion: we see you. We understand your pain. And next April, when we're posting festival selfies, just know... we'll think of you. Probably.